Lessons from a month of momentum mornings

Words by Madeleine Dore
&
Artwork by Amelia Goss

Even with good intentions and the best laid plans, it can be difficult for many of us to find the time and space to do the meaningful, but not so urgent, things in our day. We might snooze through an alarm. We might get caught up with a myriad of responsibilities. Distractions and interruptions can multiply. We can easily shift the thing to another morning. We can easily lose our momentum.

Personally, I’ve long strived to find a way to start my day that places those small but impactful things at the beginning, before they could be reshuffled and placed behind other commitments. The times I have managed to rise early and do the thing, be it journalling or writing or stretching, I have felt a sense of momentum that I have carried throughout the day.

Yet, on the whole, creating a regular rhythm of morning momentum has remained elusive for me. Without a deadline or something external to hold me accountable, starting my day on my own terms has been ad-hoc at best.

Some of us might face the same blocks not just in how we’d like to start the day or find time for those small but impactful things, but also our creative work. In my conversations with creative people, I’ve found there are things that can help with getting started and sustain our personal work. One is carving out time. Another is social pressure or accountability. And another is quiet, or distraction free moments. These ingredients – time, accountability and quiet – are what makes the method used in Side Project Sessions so helpful to myself and others for doing creative work.

I wondered if it could also help with how we start our days and finding time for the to-dos that aren’t connected to productive output, or work. Is there was a way to gain momentum in our mornings simply by carving out time, having accountability and creating distraction-free quiet?

To explore this idea, across May and June, I partnered with Knowledge Melbourne to bring a new virtual event series Momentum Mornings to life.

Across four Mondays, I was joined by over 100 people during 7am and 10am sessions where we found focus and flow for whatever task – big or small – we’ve been meaning to get around to.

People made time for the small, impactful things. Some started their day with journaling, sorting out their life direction, volunteer work. Others with writing to do lists, writing letters, writing poetry, writing novels. With exercise, stretching, meditation, job applications. With learning, life admin, reading, clearing emails, illustrations, social media planning, research, reflecting, or simply enjoying the quiet of the morning.

It was just an hour together – a small yet impactful pocket of focus and momentum during a time of uncertainty and distraction.

For those of you who missed the previous sessions or would like a recap, I’ve included the notes and reading links below to help you find momentum, whenever it suits you.

Meeting yourself: Create rituals that work for you

Morning routines are certainly glorified. We’re told that if we learn to master our mornings, we too can experience endless productivity by setting our day up for success before the rest of the world wakes. But when we follow a prescribed routine, or mimic someone else’s, we miss out on discovering what works for us.

In the words of Bruce Lee, “If you follow the classical pattern, you are understanding the routine, the tradition… you are not understanding yourself.”

How do we create rituals to help understand ourselves?

Instead of creating a morning routine centred solely around productivity, we can look at ways to simply meet ourselves. It’s important to note just how singular that can be for everyone – meeting yourself can be quiet, it could be challenging, it can be delightful, and so on.

Quiet

During his second appearance on How to Fail with Elizabeth Day, Mo Gawdat described how each morning he will follow a routine of meeting himself – that means getting up slowly, makes a coffee with attention and care, and then sitting and listening to his thoughts for 20 minutes.

This moment of quiet, similar to meditation, allows Mo to listen to his brain, which he calls “Becky” after a bully in high school. After a while of listening to Becky complain, or be negative, she will bring new thoughts – thoughts that might provide direction or something to inspect or guide his day. Mo will then write out the list of thoughts and write counter arguments for them, to show that thoughts aren’t always facts.

Quiet allows us to meet ourselves in a way that teaches us more about ourselves, easing us into greater understanding and guiding us towards what works for us.

Challenge

We might decide to meet ourselves with a challenge. “Eat the frog” is a method inspired by Mark Twain who once said that if you eat a live frog first thing in the morning, nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day.

Popularised by author Brian Tracy, the eat the frog technique suggests we tackle our most dreaded task or challenging agenda first thing in the morning when we are less susceptible to distractions.

It also can help create momentum, as the rest of the day appears to have more ease with the most challenging task out of the way.

Delight

While it can make sense to start your day with the most challenging task, I think there is also something to be said for starting it with delight.

In my conversation with Matthew Evans, the star of Gourmet Farmer on SBS on Routines & Ruts, he described how he has recently started his day with porridge and a dollop of homemade clotted cream because it meant that he was starting his day with a highlight.

Perhaps this is the “Eat the Clotted Cream” method – if we start our day with the most delightful thing, then it might just have a ripple effect on our moods as the day unfolds.

So much productivity advice is placed on getting things done, yet our lives are not simply about output – they can be geared to delight, to discovery, to play, to quiet, as well as challenge.

In the words of Louisa May Alcott, “Have regular hours for work and play; make each day both useful and pleasant, and prove that you understand the worth of time by employing it well.”

Micro-goals: Learn to embrace small steps

A common question I receive is whether I have found a commonality between the people I have interviewed and how they manage to do incredible things in their careers or creative projects.

Of course there are many variables and privileges afforded to some and not others, but if there were to be just one commonality, a thread that connects almost all, it comes down to this: start small… start really, really small.

Starting small is important as it keeps us open to possibility.

As comedian Tim Minchin puts it in this commencement speech: “I never really had one of these big dreams. And so I advocate passionate dedication to the pursuit of short-term goals. Be micro-ambitious. Put your head down and work with pride on whatever is in front of you… you never know where you might end up. Just be aware that the next worthy pursuit will probably appear in your periphery. Which is why you should be careful of long-term dreams. If you focus too far in front of you, you won’t see the shiny thing out the corner of your eye.”

Starting small and being micro-ambitious not only allows you to notice what’s on the periphery, but it also limits overwhelm from the big, scary goal or the indecision regarding where to begin.

Recently, a friend was feeling very stuck, overwhelmed and stifled by the sheer amount of work she had to catch up on for her studies She described it to me as a “tidal wave” of lectures, reading, assignments and it was hard to envision how she would wade her way through that. That’s when I said, “Well, why don’t you start with a just a puddle?” Instead of thinking about the entire wave, break that body of water down into tiny puddles that are feasible to step into.

This is what I have since termed “puddle theory,” or taking it smallest step by smallest step.

There are many ways to form puddles in order to sidestep perfectionism, overwhelm or even procrastination. For me, I like to make a list of my tasks, and then break them into the smallest tasks possible. Then I like to assign them to small pockets of time, typically 45 minutes, to step into the puddle. It’s important to tell myself only to focus on one puddle at a time, and be open to what happens next.

Taking action often has a lot to do with how enjoyable and how possible we find a task – and being curious about what’s in front of us. Splashing about in one puddle may lead us unexpectedly to another. This is a helpful reminder that it doesn’t matter so much about where we start, but the act of starting. The other puddles aren’t going anywhere.

In other words, focus on taking the first small step and the rest will follow. In the words of David Carr, “Don't worry about the plot to take over the world. Just do what is in front of you, and do it well.”

““As humans, we can have a tendency to focus on or try to control the big overwhelming picture, so we have to remember to remind ourselves over and over that late is better than never, nothing will ever be perfect, and we can only take puddle by puddle, step by step.” ”

Another key to puddle theory is to take a break between puddles to refresh and sustain momentum – after all, we all need a chance to dry off!

Puddle theory, or being micro-ambitious is a practice. As humans, we can have a tendency to focus on or try to control the big overwhelming picture, so we have to remember to remind ourselves over and over that late is better than never, nothing will ever be perfect, and we can only take puddle by puddle, step by step.

In the words of Julia Cameron, “Most of the time, the next right thing to do is small: washing out your paint brushes, stopping by the art-supply store and getting your clay, checking the local paper for a list of acting classes… as a rule of thumb, it is best to just admit that there is always one action you can take for your creativity daily. This daily-action commitment fills the form.”

We may never get to perfect, but bit by bit, micro-goal by micro-goal, puddle by puddle, we wade through what was once overwhelming.

Motivation: Rethink the drive behind your habits

Many of us might have a habit we wish to cultivate or change, but time after time, we find it difficult to stick to or implement.

When it comes to habit setting, a lot of emphasis is placed on our willpower, the output or pursuing a measurable outcome. But in my experience, arbitrary measurements can be easily sabotaged and willpower can be tenuous.

Take the habit of regular exercise as an example. For years, I was the person who kept paying a membership to a gym I never went to. I'd sign up for early morning boot camps and press snooze when the alarm sounded. I'd lug work-out gear around in my backpack all day, only to skip my run on the way home.

Why was it so difficult for me to start – let alone stick –to an exercise routine? Where was my willpower?

Now a few years into exercising consistently, I can pinpoint the fault. My previous motivation for exercising was tied to a measurable outcome – to change a number on a scale.

Having a measurement be the sole motivation created a flawed habit loop — a typical cue would be negative feelings towards that number, which would prompt the desire to build an exercise routine to change that number, with the expectation of instant change, which was unrealistic, so then I’d have negative feelings…and around I went.

To break this cycle, I had to change the motivation behind the desire for exercise habit, and what I found powerful was focusing on how I wanted to feel instead of the number I wanted to change.

Straight after a run, I felt good. I felt more focused, more clarity, more creative. Focusing on feeling rather than a measurement or a number created more opportunities for reward than for failure.

To continue with this example, another roadblock to a regular exercise habit for me was the rules I had created: I must exercise first thing in the morning, at this particular intensity, for this duration, or it doesn't count.

These rules meant I had to employ extreme self-control to stick to the habit. If I made one misstep, this could sabotage my efforts to be more consistent with exercising.

What helped was applying flexibility, which again creates more opportunities for reward than for failure. It's now one checkbox: move every day.

This idea of checkboxes is also really helpful for motivation because it makes things digestible, achievable. Similarly to puddle theory above, action begets more action. In my interview with artist and author Austin Kleon, he spoke about rather than creating the ideal routine, he uses a daily checkbox: walk, write in his journal, write a blog post, and read something. If he checks those off, it’s a good day.

Once you have your check boxes it can also create a chain that your mind doesn’t want to break, a method popularised by comedian Jerry Seinfeld known as “don’t break the chain.”

For me, when thinking about a new habit be it exercise or journaling or putting my phone away before bed, I try to keep three questions top of mind:

1. How do I want to feel?

2. How can I make it flexible?

3. How can I make it into the smallest puddle possible, or use a checkbox to keep me accountable and inspired?

When I’m completely stuck in a rut, then I turn to something else and ask myself: what can I learn?

Unlike striving for a measurable outcome, learning can never fail. In the words of T H White: “The best thing for being sad is to learn something. That's the only thing that never fails….Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting. Learning is the only thing for you. Look what a lot of things there are to learn.”

Momentum: how we can cultivate ways to pause in order to keep going

Momentum can imply endless action, but I’ve found that a key to continuing on with our habits or creative work is learning how to pause. In the words of street artist Banksy, “If you get tired learn to rest, not to quit”

It might sound counterintuitive, but breaks, and rest, is what helps us continue on. I like to think of a break as having two sides. We can feel the loss and grief of say a broken heart, but we also seek the rejuvenating break of a holiday.

In this way, a break can be both what disorientates us, and what sustains us.

During Side Project Sessions, the break makes the focus possible. Taking a 15-minutes break in between 45-minute focus work periods teaches us to pause, to refresh, to keep momentum. But these breaks can also feel uncomfortable – we might resist interrupting our flow or feel unease doing nothing.

It can be difficult to stop when we are in flow, and we might resent our downtime or feel guilty about doing nothing because we were in the zone with something, but it is important.

This is because there’s a lot of emphasis placed on getting started when it comes to creative projects – just do it, make it happen, don’t wait for inspiration, begin now.

But something I’ve seen come up again and again in my interviews is this idea about how getting started has a lot to do with how well we stop.

The Zegarnik Effect explains the tendency for us to complete the things we left incomplete. It suggests that not finishing a task creates mental tension, which keeps it at the forefront of our memory. Because humans like closure, the only thing that will relieve this tension is by completing the task. But there is one very important caveat to this: the tasks have to be attractive and possible in order for it to work. If we find the task too difficult, the Zegarnik Effect does not occur.

I’m reminded of my experience with running. After following the rule of starting small and gradually building from running two minutes at a time to reaching my goal of running for 5km, I was out with a friend who was a much more experienced runner than me. After some time, we stopped running. I was confused, because I felt I could keep going, I had another kilometre or two in me, so I asked him why. He said, “That’s exactly why – we stop when you still have momentum rather than when you’ve reached exhaustion so that the next time you set out to run you have a positive memory, and feel inspired to keep going.”

This applies to our working lives too – taking a break when we still feel inspired is actually what fuels our creativity as we minimise getting stuck with the fear of the blank page.

As Hemingway said, “I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it. I always worked until I had something done, and I always stopped when I knew what was going to happen next. That way I could be sure of going on the next day.”

A break sustains our momentum by teaching us to stop well. And it also prepares us for action because more often than not, the antidote to being afraid of the work is doing the work - and it gives us something to start with.

When it comes back to embracing the pause, I think it’s important to remember to be okay with what is left undone – and enjoy where we are at now.

As poet May Sarton once wrote, "Everything that slows us down and forces patience, everything that sets us back into the slow circles of nature, is a help."